Message to some lunatics...

Tesi: Please- in the name of all that is holy- Please spare me any more descriptions concerning a dodgy Rwandan guy in Canada and his relationship with his waistcoat.
Raymond: The story is almost done, I swear! But seriously, writing about long-distance relationships without employing cliches is about as easy as eating beans without subsequently becoming a flatulent machine, but I'll give it a shot.